10:27 PM

Drunken Man

A drunken man staggers in 2 a Roman Catholic Church & heads straight for the confessional without saying a word.The priest waits 4 the man to confess abt his sins but the man remains dead silent.The priest then knocks on the wall 3 times in attempt 2 the man to speak.Finally the drunker replies ”NO USE KNOCKING PAL THERE'S NO TOILET PAPER”

5:08 PM

OMG

5:02 PM

Terrorist

10:41 AM

English

Who says our English is teruk.?
Just see below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straightto point, effective etc........
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we
don't seem to have the sweater
you want in your size, but if you
give me a moment, I can call the
other outlets for you.
Asian : No Stock.
RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith.
Did anyone page for me a few
moments ago?
Asian : Hello, who page?
ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY .
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get
by. Would you please make way?
Asian : S-kew me
WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet
away, this drink is on me.
Asian : No-need, lah.
WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you
think it would be possible for me
to enter through this door?
Asian : (pointing the door) can
AR?
WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself
right at home.
Asian : Don't be shy, lah!
WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving
me the money.
Asian : Where got?
WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that,
if you don't mind.
Asian : Don't want la...
IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF
DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop
you there. I understand where
you're coming from, but I really
have to disagree with what you
said about the issue.
Asian : You mad, ah?
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER
THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you
please ! Lower your voice, I'm
trying to concentrate over here.
Asian : Shut up lah!
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE
KNOWS YOU.
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed
you staring at me for some time.
Do I know you?
Asian : See what, see what?
WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT
SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of
a predicament at the moment.
Asian : Die-lah!!
WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT
HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what
has just happened?
Asian : Wat happen Why like
that....
WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING
WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do
it here let me show you,
Asian : like that also don't know
how to do!!!!
WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not
disturbing me
Asian : Celaka u

10:38 AM

WTF !!

8:47 AM

One Kiss Per Yard

Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, the pretty girl said, "I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?"
"Only one kiss per yard," replied the male clerk with a smirk.
"That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten yards." With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly held it out. The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old geezer standing beside her, and smiled,
"Grandpa will pay the bill."

5:44 AM

Who Are You Talking To?

A man joined a big Multi
National Company as a
trainee.
On his first day, he dialed
the kitchen and shouted into
the phone: Get me a cup of
coffee, quickly!
The voice from the other
side responded: You fool;
you've dialled the wrong
extension! Do you know who
you're talking to?
No replied the trainee.
It's the Managing Director of
the company, you idiot!
The trainee shouted back:
And do you know who YOU
are talking to, you IDIOT?
No! replied the Managing
Director angrily.
Thank God! replied the
trainee and kept the phone
down

4:09 AM

To Make A Withdrawal

3:32 AM

Violators Will Be Towered

2:46 AM

Wish I Was A Newspaper

Wife- i wish i was a newspaper, so i`d be in ur hand all day
Hubby- i 2 wish that u were a news papers, so i could have a new one everyday.

2:14 AM

Sex

11:38 PM

Don't

11:17 PM

A Young Man

A pregnant woman boarded a bus. When she noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition.

She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing.

She had him arrested.

Then the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner.

His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn’t help noticing she was pregnant. She sat under an advertisement, which read: Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins.

I was even more amused when she sat under a shaving advertisement, which read: William’s Stick Did The Trick.

Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement, which read: Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.

8:41 PM

I Like The Way You Are Thinking

Little Jason was sitting in class doing maths problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question.
Teacher: "Jason, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one, with your gun how many would be left?"
"None," replied Jason, "cause the rest would fly away.
"Well the answer is four" said the teacher, "but I like the way you are thinking."
Little Jason says: "OK. Miss, I have a question for you now. "If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting the cone , and the third was sucking the cone, which one is married?"
"Well", said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No", said Little Jason, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you are thinking."

7:31 PM

Play The Violin

P- "Doctor, doctor, will I be able to play the violin after the operation?”
D- "Yes, of course...”
P- Great! I never could before!”

6:30 PM

Chuck Norris

4:46 PM

Keep This Bathroom Clean

4:41 PM

Underwear Company Job

A man went to an women underwear company for a job interview. The manager says,
"If you can answer these 3 questions right, the job is yours!
We pack our panties in 7 packs, 5-packs and 12 packs. Why?"
The man thinks for a moment and replies,
The 7-packs are for Sri Lankan women: one for each day of the week.
The 5-packs are for American women : one each for Monday to Friday, and they don't wear panties on weekends.
The 12-packs are for India women : one each for January, February, March April, May, June, July, August, September,October, November,December...
He got the job.....

4:31 PM

Mouse Hunt

4:20 PM

What A World Is This

When a Girl Cries
----------The World "Consoles" her
But when a boy cries
----------They say Come on man don't be A "Girl"
If A Girl slaps a Boy
----------Definitely the Boy would have "done something"
If Boy Slaps a girl
----------Rascal doesn't know how to "Respect Ladies"
If a Girl is talking to Boys
----------She is "Very Friendly"
If a Boy talks to a Girl
----------He is "flirting"
If a Girl meets with accident
----------Then its "mistake of others"
If a Boy meets with same accident
----------"Don't you know how to Drive
What A World Is this

4:15 PM

Illegal Road Racer Captured By Police

8:32 AM

A Drop In The Bucket

One day, Little Johnny's grandmother sent him to the water Hole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and ran back to grandma's house as fast as he could.
"Where's my bucket and my water?" She asked.
"I can't get any water from that water hole, there's a mean ol' alligator down there!"
"Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnny. He's been there for years, And he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!"
"Well, Grandma," replied Johnny,
"if he's as scared of me as I am of him, then that water ain't fit to drink!"

3:46 AM

Newton's Laws When He Was In A Romantic Mood

Universal law:

"Love can neither be created nor be destroyed; only it can transfer from One girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money"



First law:

"A boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, until or unless
Any external agent (brother or father of the gal) comes into play and break the legs of the boy. "



Second law:
"the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is
directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and
the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the
bank balance. "



Third law:

"the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while slapping."

3:44 AM

Did You Know????

3:41 AM

Send this Boy to OXFORD UNIVERSITY

A first-grade teacher, Ms Tulip (Age 28) was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked," Boy, what is your problem?"

Boy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

Ms Tulip had enough. She took Boy. to the principal's office. While Boy. waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms Tulip he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave. She agreed.

Boy. was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Boy: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Boy: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know. The principal looks at Ms Tulip and tells her, "I think Boy can go to the third-grade. "

Ms Tulip says to the principal, "I have some of my own questions.

Can I ask him ?" The principal and Boy both agreed.

Ms Tulip asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Boy., after a moment "Legs."

Ms Tulip: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
Boy: "Pockets."

Ms Tulip: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy: Coconut

Ms Tulip: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft And sticky? The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Boy. was taking charge.
Boy: Bubblegum

Ms Tulip: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs? The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...
Boy: Shake hands

Ms Tulip: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?
Boy: Yep.

Ms Tulip: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Boy: Tent

Ms Tulip: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first. The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large Vodka peg.
Boy: Wedding Ring

Ms Tulip: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Boy: Nose

Ms Tulip: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Boy: Arrow

Ms Tulip: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat and excitement?
Boy: Fire truck

Ms Tulip: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if u don't get it u have to use your hand.
Boy: Fork

Ms Tulip: What is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?
Boy: SURNAME

Ms Tulip: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making love ?
Boy: HEART.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher,
"Send this Boy to OXFORD UNIVERSITY EVEN I GOT THE LAST TEN QUESTION WRONG MYSELF"

3:38 AM

Wifes



3:27 AM

Edirige Satare 18

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper

3:24 AM

Edirige Satare 17

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

3:22 AM

Old Peaple

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts,which he gratefully munches up.

After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again ....he asks the little old lady, 'Why don't you eat the peanuts yourself!

'We can't chew them because we've no teeth', she replied.

The puzzled driver asks, 'Why do you buy them then?'

The old lady replied, 'We just love the chocolate around them.'


It pays to be careful around old people!!!
Heck, we'll all be there one day!!!!!

3:11 AM

Edirige Satare 16

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

3:04 AM

Edirige Satare 15

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

3:00 AM

Edirige Satare 14

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:56 AM

Edirige Satare 13

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:54 AM

Edirige Satare 12

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:43 AM

Edirige Satare 11

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

10:26 PM

Funny Egyptian Interview

Reporter: Hi
Egyptian: Hello

Reporter: Do u speak English
Egyptian: Berfect

Reporter: Do u mind if I interview u
Egyptian: No, I don't have a mind

Reporter: What's your name?
Egyptian: Taha

Reporter: Sex?
Taha: I love it

Reporter: oh no, I meant male or female?
Taha(yelling) : what do u sink?

Reporter: it's just for the sake of the report. Never mind... male....
Taha: No... I like female

Reporter: How do u find life here in Egypt ?
Taha: Egybt..Very nice cantry..nice wezar..nice food..byramidz


Reporter: Oh well..beside the weather and the pyramids..what else do u like in ur country?
Taha: Byramids, nice wezar, nice food

Reporter: DO YOU WORK?
Taha: Yas, when I am not buzy..

Reporter: What do u think about the traffic problem in Egypt ?
Taha: Very big broblem..very much cars..u see?..but za guvurment is trying to make it bettar..zey did a circle street and za mehwar street..and zey make all streets one way so if u go..u cant come back!!!

Reporter: What about the economic problems in Egypt ?
Taha: I do not undurztand what u say

Reporter: I mean..how do u deal with money problems in egypt ?
Taha: Egypt very rich cantry...we have alot of cotton..a lot of water..and we have byramidz

Reporter: So do u make a lot of money?
Taha: No no.. it is not legal to make money..one frend I know make money at home..and he go to brizon.. if u make money at home.. you will go to brizon

Reporter: let me rephrase..since Egypt is a rich country.. do u have a lot of money?
Taha: me? ...Not a lot…..but I eat and drink Alhamdulelah?

Reporter: Then where does all the money go?
Taha: Guvurment

Reporter: And what does the government do with the money?
Taha: Zey Build circle street, mehwar street and make all streets one way

Reporter: well , Ok...Do u vote?
Taha: What duz zat mean?

Reporter: Do u choose your president
Taha: Who, Mubarak?

Reporter: yes
Taha(nervously) : I didn't give my voice..But if I was. I will give him my voice

Reporter: Why him?
Taha: Because he was an airoplane in za war..he waz za leadar airoplane

Reporter: But there r no wars right now
Taha: But if we have war..u see?...we know we will have a very good airoplane in it


Reporter: what about the last 26 years?
Taha: I got marry..and have Ahmed an d Amira..and……….

Reporter: No, I meant Mubarak.
Taha: He also marry… and have…

Reporter (interrupting) :No, I meant what did Mubarak do for Egypt in the last 26 years
Taha: He build circle street, mehwar street and make all streets one way

Reporter: Thank you very much for ur time Mr. Taha
Taha: No broblem, only 10 bounds


Reporter: I never said i will pay u for this
Taha: ok ok…. Zanks a lot

10:22 PM

When God Goes Fishing



9:49 PM

Lie detecting Robot


Rahul's Dad brought home a robot one day. The robot had the ability to detect lies and would slap the person who lied.
Rahul returned late from school. Dad asked, "Son why are you late from school?"
"Dad, we had extra classes today". Robot slapped Rahul on his face.
Dad shouted, "Come on tell me the truth, why are you late?"
"Dad, I went to see the movie Ten Commandments." Robot slapped Rahul on his face.
Sorry dad, I went to see the movie "Chameli Ki Jawaani".
"Shame on you son, when I
was your age, I never watched obscene movies or misbehaved."
Immediately, Dad gets a slap on the face from the robot. Rahul's mom comes walking out of the kitchen and says to her husband,
"After all, he's your son!"
The robot slaps the mom. -
OOPS ..!!

9:48 PM

Even God Has A Sense Of Humour

God was in the process of creating the universe. And he was explaining to his subordinates "Look everything should be in balance. For example, after every 10 deer there should be a lion. Look here my fellow angels, here is the country of the United States. I have blessed them with prosperity and money. But at the same time I have given them insecurity and tension....
And here is Africa. I have given them beautiful nature. But at the same time, I have given them climatic extremes. And here is South America. I have given them lots of forests. But at the same time, I have given them lesser land so that they would have to cut off the forests... So you see fellows, everything should be in balance. One of the angels asked...
"God, what is this extremely
beautiful country here?"
God said....... "Ahah...that is the crown piece of all. "INDIA", My most precious creation. It has understanding and friendly People. Sparkling streams and serene mountains. A culture which speaks of the gret tradition that they live. Technologically brilliant and with a heart of gold..... The angel was quite surprised:
"But god you said everything should be in balance."
God replied -- "Look at the neighbours I gave them."

9:45 PM

Love Lust & Marriage


LOVE - When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST- when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

LOVE - When intercourse is called "making love."
LUST - When intercourse is called
"screwing."
MARRIAGE - When intercourse is a
town in Pennsylvania. There
really is one.

LOVE - When you argue over how
many children to have.
LUST - When you argue over who
gets the wet spot?
MARRIAGE - When you argue over
whose idea it was to have kids.

LOVE - When you share
everything you own.
LUST - When you steal
everything they own.
MARRIAGE - When the bank owns
everything.

LOVE - When it doesn't matter if
you don't climax.
LUST - When the relationship is
over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE - When . . . Uh . . .
what's a climax?

LOVE - When you phone each
other just to say, "Hi."
LUST - When you phone each
other to pick a hotel room.
MARRIAGE - When you phone each
other to ***** about work.

LOVE - When you write poems
about your partner.LUST - When all you write is your
phone number.
MARRIAGE - When all you write is
checks.

LOVE - When your only concern is
for your partner's feelings.
LUST - When your only concern is
to find a room with mirrors all-
round.
MARRIAGE - When you're only
concern is what's on T.V.

LOVE - When you are proud to be
seen in public with your partner.
LUST - When you only see each
other naked.
MARRIAGE - When you never see
each other awake.

LOVE - When your heart flutters
every time you see them.
LUST - When your groin twitches
every time you see them.
MARRIAGE - When your wallet
empties every time you see
them.

LOVE - When all the songs on the
radio describe exactly how you
feel.
LUST - When the song on the
radio determines how you do it.
MARRIAGE - When you listen to
talk radio.

LOVE - When breaking up is
something you try not to think
about.
LUST - When staying together is
something you try not to think
about.
MARRIAGE - When just getting
through the day is your only
thought.

LOVE - When you're only
interested in oing things with
your partner.
LUST - When you're only
interested in doing things TO
your partner.
MARRIAGE - When you're only
interested in your golf score.

LOVE - When a rainy day means
more time to stay inside and
talk.
LUST - When a rainy day means
more time to stay inside and
have sex.
MARRIAGE - When a rainy day
means it's time to clean the
basement.

LOVE - You only leave the house
to buy coffee and doughnuts.
LUST - You only leave the house
to buy condoms and Vaseline.
MARRIAGE - You only leave the
house when you're allowed.

9:42 PM

New Hair Cut

9:40 PM

Chinese Detective


A guy suspected that his wife was cheating on him, so he hired a Chinese detective... The cheapest one he could find.
This is his report:

Most honorable sir,
You leave house. I watch house. He come house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go hotel. I climb tree. I look window. He kiss she. She kiss he. He strip she. She strip he.. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. I fall off tree. I no see.
No fee,
Cheng Lee

9:35 PM

Danger

9:33 PM

Everything Has A Gender

You may not know this but many nonliving things have a gender.

A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.

A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

A Hammer is Male , because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

A Remote Control is Female. Ha! ou thought it'd be male ,didn't you? But consider this - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!

9:31 PM

Just Do It

9:26 PM

Wrong Number


"Hello"
"hi honey, this is daddy. is mommy near the phone?"
"no daddy she is upstairs in the bedroom with uncle paul."

after a brief pause daddy
says
"but honey u haven't got an uncle paul!"
"oh yes i do and he is upstairs in the room with mommy right now."

breif pause
"uh okay then,this is what i want u to do put the phone down on the table, run upstair knock the bedroom door and shout to mommy daddy's car just pulled in the driveway."
"ok daddy just a minute."

a while later the little girl
comes back to the phone,
"done it daddy."
"what happened honey?"
"well mommy got scared jumped out of bed naked, ran round the room screaming, tripped over and knocked her head on the dresser now she aint moving at all."
"what bout uncle paul?"
asked dad.
"he jumped out the window into the swimming pool but i guess he didn't know you

emptied the water last
week. he hit the bottom and
i think he's dead." really

long pause this time.
daddy says,
"swimming pool?.. is this 486-5731?"
"no this is 486-5713.."sorry wrong number..

9:24 PM

Art Of Coppy

3:54 AM

Driving To Phoenix

After pulling back from the gate
on a Southwest flight the plane
taxied for what seemed like
forever, never seeming to get
to the runway. Finally a flight
attendant comes on the PA and
announces, "You all may be
wondering why your tickets
were so cheap? It's because
we're driving you to Phoenix!"

3:13 AM

Heart

____0000000000______0000000000_____
__000________000__000________000___
_000___________0000___________000__
000_____________00_____________000_
000____________________________000_
000___________________________000_
_000__________________________000__
__000________________________000___
___000______________________000____
_____000__________________000______
_______000______________000________
_________000__________000__________
____________000____000_____________
______________00__00_______________
________________00_________________
________________ 0 __________

3:13 AM

Teddy

This art done by using symbols

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( '(;)' ) ,@@@
=(,,)=("')<-@@@
(""),,,("") "@@

2:43 AM

Maths

2:41 AM

Sanhinda - Obe pemwathiya mona wagada?

2:40 AM

Hum Thum

2:39 AM

Warning

2:36 AM

Dead Man

2:35 AM

Edirige Satare 10


This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:34 AM

Edirige Satare 9

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:31 AM

Edirige Satare 8

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:28 AM

Edirige Satare 7

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:26 AM

Edirige Satare 6

This is a comic story called " Edirige Satare ", published in Tharunaya News Paper.

2:25 AM

You Punk

This art done by using symbols

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.././.../..../..../.|_...._ |.\....\....\...\.\..
(.(....(....(..../.)..)...(..(.\.....)....)....).)
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....\..............(.........)................/

10:27 AM

My Boss !!!!!!!!!!!!

When I Take a long time to finish,
I am slow,
When my boss takes a long time,
he is thorough .
When I don't do it,
I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it,
he is busy .
When I do something without
being told,
I am trying to
be smart,
When my boss does the same,
he takes the initiative, he is
proactive.
When I please my boss,
I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss,
he is cooperating,
When I make a mistake,
I' am an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake,
he's only human.
When I am out of the office,
I am wandering around.
When my boss is out of the
office,
he's on business.
When I am on a day off sick,
I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick,
he must be very ill.
When I apply for leave,
I must be going for an
interview
When my boss applies for leave,
it's because he's
overworked
When I do good,
my boss never remembers,
When I do wrong,
he never forgets

10:24 AM

Real Face

10:09 AM

Put A Rubber On The End Of Your Stick

A husband and wife are waiting
at the bus stop, with them are
their 8 children. A blind man joins
them after a few minutes. When
the bus arrives, they find it
overloaded and only the wife and
her eight children are able to fit
in the bus. So the husband and
the blind man decide to walk.
After a while the husband gets
irritated by the ticking of the
stick of the blind man and says
to him.
"Why don't you put a piece of
rubber at the end of your stick,
that ticking sound is driving me
crazy!!"
The blind man replies: "If you
would've put a rubber on the
end of YOUR stick, we'd be sitting
in the bus.

10:06 AM

Nice Bed Sheet

9:56 AM

Air Canada F/A

A guy sitting at an airport bar in
Calgary noticed a beautiful
woman sitting next to him. He
thought to himself, "Wow, she is
so gorgeous she must be a flight
attendant! But which airline does
she work for?"
Hoping to gain her attention, he
leaned toward her and uttered
the Delta Slogan, "Love to fly
and it shows?" She gave him a
blank, confused stare and he
immediately thought to himself,
"Nope, not Delta." He leaned
towards her again, "Something
special in the air?" She gave him
the same confused look. He
mentally kicked himself, and
scratched American Airlines off
the list. Next he tried the United
slogan, "I would really love to fly
your friendly skies?" This time
the woman savagely turned to
him and barked, "What the &#@*
do you want?" The man smiled,
then slumped back in his
chair,and said.... "Ahhh, Air
Canada!"

6:31 AM

Fireman

6:30 AM

Your Trail Period Is Over

3:31 AM

Salesman Of Coca Cola


A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment.

A friend asked, "Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"
The salesman explained "When I got posted in the Middle East , I was very confident that I would make a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through three posters...

First poster:
A man lying in the hot desert sand...totally exhausted and fainting.

Second poster:
The man is drinking our Cola.

Third poster:
Our man is now totally refreshed.

And Then these posters were pasted all over the place "Then that should have worked!" said the friend. "The hell it should had!? said the salesman didn't realize that Arabs read from right to left"

3:22 AM

Oh My Sweety